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july 11, 2012
i am shocked * because i never would have expected it
i am scared * because i don't know what to expect or totally understand the process
i am loved * by Mark, who is my rock. my best friend. the man who i love and the one who is standing by my side
i am calm / assured * because i am held in the palm of my Heavenly Fathers hand
i am blessed * because i have an amazing family and wonderful friends. . . .
and a doctor who cares.
Fredericksburg, Texas July 2012
to say this has been a crazy summer would be an understatement.
a friend mentioned the other day that 'Jill - you haven't posted since August!'
but this time, there was a reason i was away that was more than just 'i'm busy and time is getting away from me.'
and i've finally decided that i'll share my journey and where i've 'been' because life isn't always about swaps and antique shows and grandkids growing up too fast.
so, here is my first of many posts - posts that will be taken from my journal i started on July 10th of this year. (you'll notice that grammar isn't top on the priority in these entries. i was just writing what my heart was thinking.)
my hope / plan / desire is to share an entry from my journal often, in addition to other happenings in my little studio and life.
So, here goes.
(church in Fredricksburg, Texas 2012)
July 10, 2012
cancer. it's a crummy word.
a word i never thought would be a part of my vocabulary. but, as of July 10, 2012 @6:10 pm, it's now a part of our lives.
i got the call at home from Dr. Lewis - the results of my biopsy he took just 4 days prior. his exact words were 'the results were not favorable'. results show endometrial adeno carcenoma. cancer - in the lining of your uterus.
grade 1, which has favorable results. we'll perform a complete hysterectomy. uterus, tubes, ovaries, cervix and lymph nodes. i asked if he would do the surgery, and he said no - that i'd be referred to a cancer doctor and i'd hear from them tomorrow to make the appointment. in the mean time, i had to go back to the lab tomorrow to have more blood tests and we'd go from there.
while i was on the phone, i motioned to Greg to go get dad. he came downstairs and held me while i cried. so many questions. so much unknown. but we have each other, and i am bound and determined to find a blessing in every day.
God will be glorified through my journey and i will praise Him always.